


My only fated partner is the bottom of the bottle

by timaeustestifiedsilence



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Break Up, Other, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Sadstuck, Spoilers, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-23
Updated: 2015-02-23
Packaged: 2018-03-14 18:23:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3420944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timaeustestifiedsilence/pseuds/timaeustestifiedsilence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Imagine Eridan picking up a drinking habit: wine to be classy, whiskey to get in touch with his ancestor. However, it becomes more than just a habit, and he slowly evolves into an alcoholic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fan-fiction based off of a character imagine by the tumblr blog imagine-eridan (check it out!). The original imagine is:
> 
> Imagine Eridan picking up a drinking habit: wine to be classy, whiskey to get in touch with his ancestor. However, it becomes more than a habit, and he slowly evolves into an alcoholic.
> 
> I deviated from the original imagine a little bit to fit the idea I had in mind. Also, Eridan is a little OOC, my apologies.
> 
> For the conversation/fight between Eridan and Feferi about the moirallegiance break-up, I just adapted parts of the pesterlog from this panel: http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=004367 (just copy and paste the link).
> 
> Enjoy my first fic on AO3 :)!
> 
> Homestuck © Andrew Hussie

Out of all the games he knew how to play, chess had to be the most ironic.

Every day at two o'clock, Eridan's beloved Feferi would come over to enjoy the strategy game along with a few dainty sips of wine. He drank to be classy, while she drank as to not hurt his feelings.

Lately though, she hadn't been visiting every day. Two or three days a week she would call Eridan to say that she wasn't feeling up to it. He never pestered her about it, of course.

* * *

'It's two fifteen and Fef still hasn't called. I wonder what's keeping her?' The sea-dweller was deep in thought, constantly glancing at his phone. Karkat made it mandatory for all of the trolls to have cell phones. While he really wanted nothing to do with the primitive human technology, he had to listen to his leader. 

**RING, RING**

Eridan answered at lightning speed.

"Hello?"

Poorly concealed giggles were heard from the other side, ")(ey, -Eridan."

His yellow eyes lit up as much as they could in the dimness of his hive. "Hello, Fef! Are you still coming ovver?"

There was a small pause, "No, actually. I'm reely sorry, Eridan!"

"Is evverything alright?"

"I just eel a little sick." There was a loud snort at Feferi's fish pun in the background.

"Oh, alright then. I hope you feel better soon!" Eridan cared deeply for Feferi. Her feelings towards him were most certainly limitedly pale, while his were becoming darker red by the day.

The two bid farewells before hanging up.

* * *

 

"What a freak," Sollux snorted, "he piicked up before the phone could even riing on2e!"

Feferi smacked the arm of the lowblood lightly. "S)(ut up! Maybe )(e just )(appened to be near )(is p)(one!" Sollux declared that improbable and deemed Eridan an ugly fish desperate to be fried. "Whale, are you ready to go?"

"2ure thiing, your hiighne22." The two trolls linked arms in nothing more than a moirail way and began the journey to the nearest human café.

After getting tow cappuccinos, it was down to business. Sollux took his glasses off and turned his lesser known counsellor self on. "2o. Are you really planniing on breakiing up your moiirallegiiance with Eriidan?" It had been a pressing matter for weeks, and quite frankly, he was sick of seeing such an indecisive Feferi.

"Yes. Yes, I t)(ink so. It's just so draining, you know? )(e's actually really needy and )(e isn't very careful wit)( t)(ings! I mean, I'm not )(is lusus!" Sollux steepled his fingers as he listened. He and Eridan had never really gotten along very well, and Feferi was stuck in the middle of it. When he first heard that she was considering ending her moirallegiance with Eridan he was worried; Eridan was the type to be clingy to the point of violence, giving Sollux the sneaking suspicion that the isolated seadweller might try something funny, like kidnapping his 'fated partner'.

"How do you plan two tell hiim?" Sollux asked.

Feferi took a sip of her cappuccino before answering, "I was just going to tell )(im over Trollian. I'd rat)(er not tell )(im face-to-face if I don't )(ave to"

"Good iidea."

"What do you t)(ink eel say?"

What did he think? "Honestly, he'll probably fliip out and go p2ycho. When you tell, hiim, let me know. You need two come two my hiive riight away, ju2t iin ca2e he de2iide2 two 2top by your2."

Feferi smiled appreciatively, showing all of her pointy teeth, "Tank you so much, Sollux. It makes me so )(appy t)(at you're nice to me and I just want to GLUB!"

Mismatched eyes twinkled with delight, and a slight mustard yellow blush appeared, "II could 2ay the 2ame two you, Fef." The rest of the café visit was full of smiles and laughter. Afterwards, Feferi decided to go with Sollux back to his hive to see how to hack a human mainframe. 

* * *

 

Eridan couldn't believe it. It had been a month - a whole  _31_   _days_ of silence on Feferi's end. Was it something he said? He couldn't tell. His feelings weren't hurt or anything, or course not! He was a strong, independent troll. A highblood.

Oh, who was he kidding. He couldn't handle being alone. The number of empty wine bottles proved it. What's the point of drinking to be classy when there's no on to drink classily with?

The seadweller didn't bother with Trollian either. Everyone else was below him and therefore unworthy of his time and effort (except Feferi). So, instead, Eridan sought after the memories and stories of his ancestor, the Orphaner Dualscar. Adequately named,  Dualscar was in charge of killing lusii to feed the ever hungry Gl'bgolyb, orphaning trolls.

Unknown to most, while Dualscar's kismesis with Mindfang was going downhill, whiskey started replacing her. As per usual with strong alcohol, it didn't take much to get drunk. Slow thinking, moving, everything. He loved the numbing effects, but of course, hated it for the hangover he got the next day. 

Long story short, Eridan followed in his ancestor's steps. He no longer opened the shades. Sunlight was ten times worse with a hangover. A majority of the light sources in his house had been smashed throughout the course of several drunken rampages. Pretty much everything besides Eridan's wand(s), Ahab's Crosshairs, husktop, wardrobe, recuperacoon, and basic furniture was destroyed. His hive was trashed. He didn't really care anymore.

* * *

 

twinArmaggedons [TA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

 

TA: hey kk

CG: WHAT

TA: not that ii care or anythiing but

TA: do you know what2 up wiith eriidan?

CG: NO, WHY WOULD I CARE

TA: ii dont know

TA: iit2 ju2t that ii havent 2een hiim on trolliian iin more than a month

TA: at fiir2t ii thought he ju2t broke hii2 hu2ktop by tryiing two take iit underwater agaiin

TA: but then ii hacked iintwo hii2 hu2ktop

TA: he liiterally ha2 not touched iit 

CG: SO

TA: no

TA: you dont get iit, kk

TA: hii2 mou2e ha2 not budged 2iin2e a month ago

CG: MAYBE HES DEAD

TA: maybe he ii2

TA: we 2hould go check on hiim

CG: NO

TA: kk

CG: NO

TA: KK

CG: I SAID NO, CANT YOU READ?

TA: KARKAT

CG: FINE

 

twinArmaggedons [TA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

* * *

twinArmaggedons [TA]  began trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC] 

 

TA: hey fef

CC: Hi Sollux!

TA: have you talked two eridan re2ently?

CC: No, why?

TA: 2o you havent ended the moiirallegiiance yet

CC: No, I kinda forgot. I just got really busy with my cuttlefish and it just slipped my mind.

CC: What's wrong with Eridan 38O ?

TA: he ha2nt touched hii2 hu2ktop iin more than a month

TA: he probably thought you diidnt want two talk two hiim of 2omethiing

CC: Oh no no no!

TA: yeah

TA: kk and ii are gonna go check on hiim

CC: Can I come?

TA: you really 2houldnt, ii dont know what kk and ii wiill fiind

TA: ii dont want you two get hurt

CC: Okay 38(

CC: Good luck! Tell me how it goes!

TA: 2ure thiing

 

twinArmaggedons [TA]  ceased trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC] 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to split the story in two for added suspense.
> 
> Enjoy!

*BANGBANGBANG*

Karkat pounded on the front door of Eridan' s hive. No answer. He tried a few more times before Sollux pushed him out of the way. After a quick flash of red and blue, the door was gone.

The highblood's hive was eerily quiet. Even with eyesight as keen as theirs, they had a hard time seeing anything.

Sollux was the first to go in, "Hello, anyone here?" There was no answer, but his sharp hearing picked up faint snoring coming from a deeper part of the hive.

The two began picking their way through the mess of broken lamps and glass bottles. "Holy hoofbeasts," Karkat muttered, "what happened?" Sollux simply shook his head, still heading towards the snoring.

Eridan's bedroom door was slightly ajar. Karkat pushed it open with his foot to reveal an even darker room, darker than the depths of hell, it seemed. The sopor slime of the seadweller's recuperacoon nearly glowed. Psionics flickered on to provide some light, revealing Eridan's slumped form, half in, half out of his recuperacoon. The strong scent of something bitter was heavy in the air.

"Eridan!" Karkat yelled, hopping around unknown objects on the floor. He grabbed the highblood and shook him roughly. He said nothing, but his snores were disrupted. "Jegus . . what's wrong with you?"

Sollux bent over to pick up one of the many plastic bottles at his feet, "Whii2key? Jeez, II thought Eriidan only drunk wiine."

"Guess not," Karkat said, snorting in disgust, "isn't this what humans call alcoholism? Alcohol dependency that takes over your life or something?" Sollux nodded and turned to leave.

"Let2 go. He'll wake up iin a few hour2 - II'll pe2ter hiim then." Karkat nodded silently, and the two left the drunk highblood to deal with his own problems.

* * *

cuttlefishCuller [CC] began trolling twinArmaggedons [TA]

 

CC: )(ow's Eridan?

TA: fiine

CC: Reely?

TA: yeah he2 fiine

CC: Sollux 38(

TA: ye2

CC: Are you lying to me?

TA: no

CC: 38|

CC: Okay...

CC: I trust you, Sollux.

TA: thank you.

 

cuttlefishCuller [CC]  ceased trolling twinArmaggedons [TA]

 

TA: iit2 for your own good. 

* * *

 

Eridan woke up around midnight the next day. Or something like that. His hangover was like the Satan of all hangovers. He was also still pretty drunk, so crawling out of his recuperacoon, falling flat on his face, then tripping several times on the way to his front door didn't hurt him much. He'd feel it later. For now, he was determined to see Feferi.

It had been a while since he'd swum but it didn't matter. He couldn't drown.

Feferi's underwater palace, much to Eridan's disadvantage, was very brightly lit. Still, he pushed on.

Meanwhile, Feferi was counting her many cuttlefish. She got to 100 when she heard a loud pounding at her front door.

'A visitor? At t)(is time? I wonder w)(o it could be!' Feferi thought, opening the door.

It was Eridan. He was drunk and disheveled. Still, he smiled at the sight of his moirail. "Hi, Fef!" slurred words, spoken a few octaves higher than usual. "Howw's my FAVourite moirail?"

Feferi's mouth went 'glub glub', but there was no noise. "Eridan, um, )(i...w)(at are you doing )(ere?"

He seemed perplexed, "I'm just vvisiting, Fef! Am I not allowwed to see my favvourite girl?"

"Eridan, look. We need to talk," Feferi sighed, "I don't t)(ink we need to be moirails anymore. It just doesn't seem necessary!" Now Eridan's mood had changed. He was visibly angry, but Feferi had to let this out. "I mean, look at you rig)(t now! You're drunk out of your mind! I can't keep looking after you and keeping you out of trouble. )(onestly, I'm  ex)(austed."

"No...you don't mean it, do you. You're just being hasty. Wwe are supposed to be fated to be moirails! You can't just throww me awway because you're sick of me!" He was yelling at her now, advancing closer. Feferi backed away quickly.

"I am not sick of you, Eridan! I still really like you. But for a moirallegiance, bot)( people )(ave to be on board. I just...I can't do it anymore. I t)(ink it just wasn't meant to be all along." Eridan was trying his best to process the situation, but it wasn't going well. Feferi continued anyway, "You just don't need me anymore. You are free to do as you wish! We bot)( are. I can't look after you anymore."

Something inside Eridan had snapped, though. He bared his teeth and pulled out his wand, backing Feferi into a corner, "I DIDN'T EVVER NEED ANYONE TO LOOK AFTER ME!" Now Eridan's wand was crackling white, and it seemed that he was posed to kill her. Thankfully, since he was drunk, his reaction time was slowed. Feferi quickly swam up and around him, propelling herself out the front door.

Eridan yelled angrily at her, an arc of white lightening  narrowly missing her and instead destroying part of her hive. She didn't care at this point. She just knew she needed to get somewhere safe. Sollux chose that moment to pester her over Trollian, where she told him the situation, and that she was on her way over. 

* * *

 

Eridan was alone. Utterly alone. Feferi had left after breaking up their moirallegiance. 'She's probably headed to see that filthy mustard blood,' he thought, wrinkling his nose. 

He didn't care, though. He just wanted to go back to his hive and sleep.

Passing alarmed cuttlefish and the large hole he had blast in Feferi's hive, Eridan slowly made his way back home.

When he arrived, the first rays of daylight began to show. Water dripped on the lush carpet of his hive. Cape off, wand on the desk.

Slipping into his recuperacoon, Eridan cracked open a bottle of whiskey and tipped it towards the sky, paying tribute to Dualscar.

"My only fated partner is the bottom of the bottle."

 

 

END


End file.
